Crescent Theatre. 18 December 2025
By: Claire Dowie. Directors: Liz Light & Jacob Lenton.
This piece was written and performed as a monologue by Claire Dowie, a pioneer of Stand-Up Theatre. I was very intrigued to see it performed by this large group, especially given Stage 2 is a youth theatre group. I wondered how it would translate from monologue to full stage production but I thought it was done really well, and I would never have known it wasn’t written for a large cast.
The story is about a person having a panic attack in Primark, leading them to spiral into ‘shopophobia’. They then embark on a surreal journey, filled with dark humour and a satirical search for meaning in our addiction to fast-fashion.
The show started with the whole cast on stage, standing around in small groups, chatting (in character) while we took our seats. The downside to this was that the audience kept chatting for far too long, partly because they didn’t have the visual cues normally provided by lights dimming and curtains opening.
I felt the opening scene went on a little too long and heard the people behind say the same thing. However, the cast soon snapped into place, all the lights went off, and the audience went quiet. The first scene had Jed (or possibly Ted or Jim) standing on the steps, shining a light onto each member of the cast as they each gave a few words. My only criticism is that he stood right in front of me and I was unable to see for the first part of the scene.
This was ensemble playing at its finest and it was so well done. The very large cast worked together SO well, especially when they all whispered in unison, or when they all shouted, “what a bargain”. There wasn’t one voice out of sync. They all froze mid-action, and this was also done beautifully. Use of the stage was great, and the cast were in and out of the audience. This also worked very well.
The piece was filled with humour and there were some very, very funny lines. Several times the whole audience laughed out loud. We especially loved “Nobody takes a Brummie seriously”.
I loved the scene about Aunt Alice. Especially when she wondered if, although Jews and Muslims can’t eat pork, can pork eat them? This drew a roar of laughter from the audience.
The music choices were fabulous all the way through and had the audience joining in at times. I loved the parts where the entire cast stamped to the beat. This is something I’ve seen this group do before and they do it well. Anyone who’s ever been part of a play knows how hard it can be to move perfectly in unison but these young people excel at it. They are so well rehearsed, and pacing and direction is impeccable. You can often tell when a director isn’t very good. But a good director is the unsung hero of a piece, and these directors did an excellent job.
With such a large cast, it’s impossible to name everyone, and that’s especially tricky when, as in this play, there aren’t any characters as such. Having said that, each and every one of these young people was excellent. Their voices were strong. They were hilariously funny. They moved beautifully, and their absolute professionalism was a joy to watch.
It was just fabulous all round.
Thank you Stage 2, for another excellent night of theatre. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to the Primark sales.
Reviewed by – Lesley L
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